The Power of Presence by Monica Gelinas

Monica with her mom, Viola Blythe

I walked into our home and there was a gift on the kitchen counter. It was a surprise gift from my husband. I felt loved and energized.

I remember the time when my daughter lived in Austin and I texted her to come over for a little surprise gift. She was elated as she saw it was her Christmas gift that had been on backorder. She was expecting a gluten free muffin! Her smile and outward expression of joy washed over me and her sister observing.

Most people enjoy surprises and gifts. 

I especially do as I explored The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman. His tool helped me to recognize and understand the five ways people receive love. Because of the insight, I have been able to embrace gifts and surprises with a new sense of purpose. 

I have also been keenly aware of how my children, friends, and coworkers receive love. It makes a difference in the quality and growth of my relationships. Embracing the surprise element in life helps me grow and change and it adds a jolt of energy!

But sometimes the surprise is not a present, but a PRESENCE. 

My beautiful mom is now 93. (photo above) I like to surprise her with a visit to New Mexico to celebrate her birthday. One year, her 86th birthday, the majority of the family were present and we celebrated her with letters, gifts, cake and the pure enjoyment of being a family. 

I noticed she was able to fully embrace every moment and freely express how happy she was. She has savored the experience and since I stayed with her for a few days, I got to bask in her contentment. 

The power of the physical presence struck me. The level of love she felt was intensified by the physical presence of her family. It was a concentrated form of love. 

I am constantly challenged by the pull of connecting through text, email, technology and bypassing the more concentrated form of connecting: being with a person. 

Of course, it takes more time, more effort and some sacrifice, but in the end, it produces exponentially more positive emotion and anchoring roots for walking our life journey. 

So, next time I am aware of a friend, family or even an acquaintance going through a hard time, reaching a milestone or asking for time, I will step out and surprise them with a visit.

My mom was beyond grateful for my presence and as I boarded the plane home, I was the one who was blessed beyond words, for HER presence!

This post reminds us of the power of both tangible gifts and the invaluable gift of presence. Which of the five love languages resonates most with the people you care about? Take some time to reflect on how you can intentionally show them love in a way that truly speaks to their heart, perhaps with a surprise of your own!

There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.

John 15:13

In loving memory of my mom, Viola Blythe.